What the Yankees can learn from World Series champion Nationals

The Nationals are your 2019 World Series Champions. Fortunately, the blueprint for onlookers, even the Yankees, to championship glory is clear. Here are the lessons Yankees brass should take from Washington to bring a trophy back to the Bronx for the first time in a decade (gulp!).

Acquire the next generational pitching prospect the only way possible
Stephen Strasburg is either the best or second-best pitcher in team history, and his perfect 5-0 record and 1.98 ERA through the 2019 playoffs established his legacy as one of the best postseason performers of all time. He was drafted first overall in the 2009 draft, back when the Nationals were completely bereft of talent, which only leads to one conclusion — the best way to acquire premium talent like him is to systematically cannibalize your team until it is worthy of acquiring a top pick.

If the Yankees were smart, they would simply coordinate the worst season in franchise history with a polished Hall of Fame-caliber talent’s declaration with the MLB draft.

This is the easiest one of all because it doesn’t require all that much effort, with no significant minor league development necessary.

Here is how the Yankees can grab their next franchise ace.

Trade Aaron Judge for a competitive balance pick. Trade Gary Sanchez for the right to consider trading for a competitive balance pick. Trade Gleyber Torres to Showtime for “Desus and Mero” on the PA between innings, then platoon Desus and Mero at designated hitter. Trade Luis Severino to the Mets for a Shake Shack at Yankee Stadium. Use the newly obtained proximity to Shake Shack to feed everyone chocolate milkshakes during pregame.

If there is an obvious steroid, one that can’t be masked, give your last remaining good players that steroid so they test positive by Opening Day.

OK, the Yankees have lost every bit of major league caliber talent, but they’re still significantly better than the Tigers, Orioles and Marlins. That won’t do. They must untry even harder.

Don’t let Rawlings and the league spoil what you could botch yourself. Dejuice your own balls, except the balls your pitchers throw, which should be rejuiced.

Handcuff your coaching staff. You know how Marcus Thames always instructs batters to put their “A swing” on the ball, leading to more consistent barrel-to-ball contact, helping numerous Yankees to have career-best seasons? Well, if he doesn’t start sabotaging his hitters’ approach (and his reputation) maybe he’s better off teaching City College students competing for Division III supremacy.